- Ffion Evans
- Jul 6, 2021
- 11 min read
For a long time i have wanted to do something i was passionate about, i just know what i wanted, what i believed or how i would carry these actions out. I had nothing but good intentions. I knew i was fed up of the modern way of living and it was after i came home from rehab that i decided to find out who i was what i cared about, and what i wanted to do with myself. Having wasted too many years than i could bare to think about, I felt an urgency, and an overwhelming sensation that i was late, and playing catch up. I was housed at this point but not in suitable housing. Despite my efforts, i wasn't able to get housing that met my needs and i was living in what was initially supported housing through Gwalia.
While i appreciate i wasn't in a great place and their hands were relatively tired regarding how they could actually support me, i had done rehab, and was demonstrating a period of sobreity within my community. I was actively seeking support surrounding my housing issues, but the bedroom tax, and new universal credit and benefit changes meant that at the time, in the eyes of Gwalia/Powys/Pobl, was adequately housed for a single person, who didn't have custody of their children. The fact that as a recoving addict i was isolated and deeply unhappy there made no difference.
When given the bedsit, i was greatful but had been assured it wouldn't be permanent, though the building eventually became general housing and supported housing was withdrawn from the occupants of the dol y dderwen gwalia supported housing project.
Supported housing is extremely expensive, and i was absolutely blown away at the actual cost when i signed my tenancy agreement. For a vulnerable adult in the uk, one of the wealthiest economies at the time in the world, for me to live in a open plan one room property with a private kitchen and bathroom area, amounted to more than £1,600....... It was actually more costly than my Rehab's weekly rate, which was £1000 per week, at the time i went 2018.
I was assured that the local authority would not continue to provide me with that level of support long term, Support workers were led to believe this was something that we would be supported with at Rehab, though it was evident very soon, that this was not exactly true, and that there was nowhere near the level of support needed for this in that setting where the focus seemed to be on physical exercise, and wall to wall therapy.
Within two days of moving into that very bedsit, the severity of its unsuitability was highlighted when I was attacked, not for the first time by an abusive ex partner.
It was a ground floor flat and the situation never improved during my time in the gwalia bedsit. I hadn't even gone to rehab yet and i was already living in nightmare, and this continued for two years. Remaining in this unsuitable accommodation was also having an impact on the progress i felt i should have made with my contact and my children, who werent allowed in the building, and without the risk of domestic violence, i was usrrounded by men, with issues, who often partied, quarrelled and played loud music, slammed doors, left communal doors unlocked when i was trying to keep my ex out........
During these years there were several attacks, which eventually led to me abandoning my tenancy at the bedsit. From the moment i had move into that little bedsit, i never knew peace, i lived in a war zone, and after two years of it, and worn down by domestic abuse, i eventually got so low that fed up and not seeing a light at the end of the tunnel i tried to kill myself and i took an overdose.
I laid in bed and went to sleep and i hoped that i wouldn't wake up. When that didn't work, I was done being sad and now i was mad and i didn't know I could control my temper anymore, i was so fucking angry!!!! I vowed I would live free or die trying!!!! When my ex turned up and climbed in through my window, I forced him out. We had been here before, and i was tired of going round in circles, as much as i was scared i might be killed and begining to fear myself, and what i may eventually do having been pushed so far beyond anything i had ever experienced before in my life, which was terrifying if you consider that i had formed a long standing pattern of unsuitable and abusive relationships before i found myself in this one.
Within 3 days a friend who i'd lost along my road to ruin, who'd had recently come back into my life, Erika, visited and brought me supplies as i couldn't face going out. She stayed for a cuppa tea and within no time at all, my ex showed up at my window, I must have seemed crazy now, and looking back i see i probably was completely and utterly demented, because nobody should take the things that i had taken, nobody should ever fear going home, Nobody should ever allow a person to exploit, bully or abuse them, not ever. But when Erika saw how broken i was she went outside and sat in her car, checked the coast was clear and came back for me, i left everything i had rebuilt in the two years since i left rehab and i did something beautiful and i started again.......... again like innit
Even knowing what i know know now i know i made the right choice because no matter what struggles i faced i was safe and though i had no clue just how much that relationship had damaged me then, i would soon know all about it. When people talk about PTSD, they most likely imagine war hero's and near death experience survivors, and policemen, firemen and paramedics. People who have to make important decisions have stressful jobs ect. I never visualised housewives among the casualties of PTSD. I am survivor but living in fear for such a long time really effected me, i was a a diffferent person and i felt like i was wired up wrong, a phase a smell or place could set off the worst kind of "episodes" these seem to be less manageable at some times than others, flashbacks, severe anxiexty attacks, manic episodes......
I have been homeless since i left my bedsit, with the exception a brief period, in which the local authority accepted an obligation to house me in the beginning of 2020, though this was later deemed impossible, because of suitable social housing in Powys. There are so few, 1 bedroom properties in the area, people like myself who aren't entitled to full housing benefit payments wont be considered for properties that we cant fully occupy. The Bedroom tax had made many people homeless because they ran up debts on their tenancies, resulting in evictions, and I can only assume that local authorties began adjusting their policies and the way that social housing was allocated. The system seems designed to keep people who need housing out. There are more blocks than bridges for long term homeless. in order to repay my current debts with powys, i would need to make an fantastic wage and have no cos/ low cost accommodation, or on benefits find a property that was within my £249.00 housing benefit allowance, so i could honour a repayment plan, and in all likelihood find myself faced with making a choice between heating and eating, and reliant on other support to bridge the gaps.
Imagine if there was a stepping stone for people with long term housing issues, living in poverty and wanting a life that will eventually reflect their efforts to improve their lives, allow them a degree of financial freedom, while helping them to develop alternative skills that would allow them to survive, living in a self built off grid eco-house, without benefits, and living in a way that impacts positively on not just people who need and deserve a home, and a base, but the enviroment around them? Climate change is a real concern, if you arent worried about it, you should be, because the current modern ways of living, a "disposable" culture, oceans full of plastic, wars fought over arms, oil and religion, YOLO culture, and consumerism, isn't just destroying the planet it's destroying humanity. Why arent we utilising building materials from recycling and repurposed everyday, disposable items? Recycling is amazing its a cause i believe in, but i also know that this can be an expensive service to put in place.
I know bin men who have disclosed that despite hefty fines that can be enforeced |(though rarely are) to those who do not comply with the recycling rules, and make use of this service, if people mix up their recycling, even one item being visibly in the incorrect container, they have to leave it all. Worse than this is that much of the time, watse intended for recycling facilities ended up in landfill because of poor time keeping, not because of the bin men but the constant cut backs have seen local rubbish collections drastically reduced and this has been a consistent bone of contention here in my county, Powys.
If third world countires are ablo make use of some of the plastic and glass waste and create eco-friendly sustainable housing, thats produce minimal carbon footprints. Why is it that they cant emulate that here in the Uk? Where we have a poverty pandemic that concerns me far more than COVID-19 ever has. If we care so little about the most vulnerable members of our society, then maybe we're better off dying out. Homelessness has not gone away, its still very much a current issue though it seems the mainstream media has forgotton them, there are organisations and charities working tirelessly to support them and guide them to better futures and brighter days.
Homeless Hope - is just one of the local voluntry nurse- led non profit charities for want of a better word who specialise in providing the inner city homeless community with DIGNITY!!!!
Donna Chapman, and her equally amazing team of nurses give up their limited spare time, when not working in the nhs as nurses, provide much needed and valued footcare. They are a fantastic organisation who have created a support service that gives these homeless people, haircuts, hot food and drinks, packed lunches, footwear and footcare, clothing, outdoor equipment such as tents and camping equipment, even hugs!!!! The service has grown with zero government funding and support and i know the ladies and gentlemen who volunteer at this project are dynamic and solution focused, and they have supported service users into suitable safe accommodation since they began their work in 2009, they provide furniture and all kinds of meaningful support to people who attend their street clincs, they are truly inspirational and i am proud to even know Donna. Who is frankly extraordinary, she was a homeless teenager, through no fault of her own, she had lived on the street but managed to turn her life around and go on to help countless people and raise awareness on homelessness and issues that homeless people face daily, and is also utilising things that people would have otherwise discarded in some way, or remained unused and of no use to the people who had these items in their lofts, cupboards, sheds, wardrobes and cupboards under the stairs.
Donna was able to mobilise communities, and volunteers across Wales and create an amazing service and all by asking people who had unused items, they no longer used, and were willing to part with to donate them to Donna, and was done in this way because she knew that times were hard people all over were feeling the strain of zero hour contracts, cut backs, redundancies. From that genuinely brilliant appeal, she found that people soon wanted to do more, and she connected her service with organisations who wanted to assit them and provide hot, nutitional food, people gifted medical supplies needed for the nurses to keep operating the street clincs safely and with minimal risks to paitents and themselves. People began donating all kinds of amazing resources to Homeless hope because of incredible work that they do and wanted to be a small part of it. If you would like to help the ladies keep doing what they do follow this link and get in touch with donna and her fab team, https://www.facebook.com/groups/282821565683212/.
Last winter when working on a voluntary role, i made friends with a woman who would go on to become a valued friend and fierce supporter of all i do. When we got to know one another and i became aware of my friends simply fascinating background, i became even more interested by her and through hearing her story, being an active community member from her teens, and goin on to work for various charities and achieving some simply amazing achievements and even awards for her work within those projects and causes that she had championed through various charities. She has been actively living a less materialistic and more self sustained life, she has a beautiful almost off grid home that allows her to live off the land, in a sustainable way she even has solar pannel's, and is currently working to bring sustainable energy into focus for a charity development that is really innovative and exciting and is simply oozing potential, she was really motivated to bring these kinds of projects into our immediate community here in powys. We began talking about this more and more and eventually she said okay enough talking, just blinking do it already, and so i did!!!
It started as ideas jotted down in a notepad and eventually it started to grow in my mind i began to imagine how to find solutions to issues like lack of suitable social housing and widespread food poverty, in a small but powerful way bust like Donna had done and just as my friend had been doing her whole life as an activist, who had helped organise and volunteered at countless coummnity events, peaceful protests, community projects aimed at diy culture, empowerment, and premaculture, by utilising glass and plastic items that people are getting rid of in anyway, and creating low cost no cost housing, hay bail houses, sandbag houses, plastic bottle brick housing, the list is actually longer than you think, you woul dbe amazed at what can be used and how they use these materials in contruction where funding is low or there is no funding.
The Welsh government seem to be moving in the right direction on sustainable housing in rural communities such as mine, but more can be done more must be done if we are to ever get a grip on the growing climate change concern we are faced with, while so many people are struggling to get on the property ladder, there does seem to be schemes in place that seek to support people looking to find and buy land and begin a self build project, these are in my mind still very costly and frankly look like mass produced 3 up 3 down cardboard boxes, that wont compliment he landcapse in the same way that hay bail houses might at a fraction of the cost, freeing up valuable funds to implement solar, wind or water powered energy production?
While there are some really hi tech and expensive eco homes popping up in places like swansea, these are not realistic goals for a person who in their mid thirties is still sofa surfing with friends and family. So much more could be done to get people to pay attention to the severity of climate change if we stopped limiting "progress" to those with money and consistently seeking to profit from what should be a common interest to everybody, the preservation of nature, our enviroment and the impact we have on it, sustainability and finding innovative solutions to solve homelessness.
Giving people who have failed at traditional housing methods, maintaining a tenancy, have debts that prevent them being housed, or long term blocks to social housing an oppertunity to lift themselves out of poverty learn skills that will sustain their off grid/ self built communities, provide oppertunities for people who just need a break. This experience could be so beneficial to people who want to help themselves, are motivated and willing to try something new. Supporting and empowering them through self build workshops techniques and design, community garden projects ........
Imagine what could be if we just stand together, and ask for nothing more than a chance, and things that people are already throwing away? Instead of suggesting they give us "handouts" we asked that they gave us "a helping hand" and help us lift ourselves
My goal is to help people whatever their financial position, find a way to make their off grid lives a reality, and connect people who will create collectives, communities having established compatibility for themselves within my various online spaces, that will riplle out into our real world and open spaces.
I am working on government support, council support, building the movement, and getting Senedd to back the movement, and possibly help us to revive an old welsh law, or right to live on common land provided you can build it, with one stone/solid wall, and three surrounding walls, and get a fire lit in the hearth by morning that these people would havethe right to live on the land, not ownership of it,"Ty Unno"
Using art as my weapon and joining craftavism movements all over the glove i am trying to engage the community through sustainable art projects i will showcase and document through various online platforms, create public appeals for glass donations, create informatve content, relating to my projects and long term goals for the freedom fighters wales collective <3
